How I Brought a Kitten Back to Life

Posted on February 1, 2012


It was the dead of February and I was fourteen and my dad was gone on business and I was the man about the farm. I had to feed the horses twice a day. In the evening I went out in the winter dark to go to the barn to get the feed and low and behold there on the cold cement floor of the bar was a just-born slimy wet kitten, mewling feebly and just the size of a mouse. I scooped it up in my glove and looked around for the mom. The mom was merely a kitten herself. Only a year old and as dumb as any teen mom could be. But somewhere lurked the evil Tom, knocking up teen cats left and right with out a care in the world, damn him!

but then I saw teen cat, scared out of her mind, crouched down looking at me and then looking at her ass and then looking at me again. Now, we think of mammals being born as if they come out bit by bit, first the head and then other parts subsequently. But this teen cat birthed before me a kitten that did not come out… it appeared, as if summoned. It appeared immediately out of the thin air. The kitten was not there and then it was. The only sign that it came from the mom is that it was there behind her and also that it scared her considerably and she ran away about the barn in a panic. I scooped the kitten and followed and sure enough another kitten appeared like magic from her retreating ass. I scooped that one and now held three bewildered kittens who didn’t know shit about shit and were mewling in a rage because of it, poor cold babies.

The teen mom hid behind a stack of plywood. I, holding my three hot little wiggling swiss cake rolls, pulled the plywood away from the wall and somehow grabbed Teen mom by the neck and then dragged them all to a small cat kennel we had and I tossed them all inside. I threw a towel in also and then adjusted everyone one so they were all lying in a kitty pile. Then teen mom sniffed the wiggling babies and figured out that she liked them and then she licked them and they plunged about with their blind heads until they figured out where the food was and then everything was as it should be. Then another kitten appeared from her ass and that one too was licked and welcomed and it was a happy family.

Well I went back to the plywood on a hunch and looking behind, I found on the cold floor a limp little kitten. I scooped her and put her with the rest. I put the kennel downstairs in the basement where it was warm and then finished the horse chores.

In the morning I checked the kennel and the mom was relaxed and cool and had realized her purpose and all the kittens were wiggling and wriggling around in a heap over her, except for one: the same that had laid on the concrete floor behind the plywood for too long. She was cold to the touch and didn’t move at all whatsoever.

Now I had heard somewhere, that a kitten that seemed by all accounts dead (and I learned later was actually scientifically dead—that is, has no heart beat) could be brought back to life if gently rubbed in a towel.  So I took out the little dead kitten, cold and limp as a banana peal and folded her in a towel and gently rubbed her like you would rub a rose that you didn’t want to bruise. I did that for twenty-five minutes. Then she was warm. I rubbed her again for another ten minutes and her head moved over the towel with a little barely audible mew. Then I tucked her back in with her writhing siblings on the mom’s stomach. I checked back again that afternoon and she was just as mobile and livid as the rest of her companions all fighting to live.

And that’s how I brought a kitten back to life.

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